47 Things I've Learned So Far
This Monday I turn 47. Here's one lesson from every year I've lived.
I’m a day late than my planned publication date. I doubt you noticed. My only “excuse” is a cliche, boring one. It’s been a busy few weeks with my business, and I’ve got a busy weekend ahead still. Groceries, errands, bills, planning a trip for next week. Duck game tonight. I’m going to see Slipknot tomorrow and Monday I turn 47. I’m taking a quick break to get this post off while I have a minute.
This week I decided to share 47 things I have learned since my birth all those years ago in 1977….Maybe you’ll find some of these useful, maybe you’ll resonate with some of them, or maybe you’ll decide I’m batshit crazy.
Either way, these are the biggest lessons I’ve learned, in no particular order. I hope you enjoy and have a great weekend.
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PS: If you haven’t seen the new Beetlejuice sequel, change that immediately. It’s a fucking masterpiece.
47 Things I've Learned So Far
1. Time is the most valuable resource on earth. It's the one thing you can never, ever get back. Use it wisely. Don't waste it.
2. Truth is a diamond with many sides, all of which make it beautiful. None of these makes any of them more valid than the others.
3. Do your best every day. That's all we can do.
4. Never stop learning. Even masters don't know it all. There's always room to learn something new.
5. Forgive but don't forget.
6. Politics is the Art of Controlling Your Environment. If you aren't controlling it, someone else is. And they probably don't have your interests in mind. Vote like life depends on it. Because it does. Do not take it for granted. And always vote locally. Local elections have as much, if not more, impact on your life than a president.
7. Trust your intuition, to your heart. It will never lead you astray. Use your brain to support your heart. Reversing this order can and usually lead to regrets. The mind can easily manipulate itself.
8. The news is mostly PR or ratings-driven. It's all surface-level, agenda-based, and sensational. There's always more to every story you ever hear. Always.
9. Write often. Write for yourself. Write for others. Just write. Especially if you don’t think you’re a writer. You’ll be surprised at what you come up with.
10. Music is sacred. Treat it as such. Listen to it. Create it. Study it. Share it. Love it.
11. Be kind. But take no shit. If someone treats you poorly, don't endure it.
12. If you're going through hell, keep going. Another era is not only possible, it's inevitable. Never let the agony of today define tomorrow's chance.
13. Loyalty is earned.
14. Respect should always be given, even when you have not been shown any. Never stoop to their level. The view is better on the high road.
15. If your soul isn't fulfilled, you'll know it. Don't ignore the signs.
16. Sales, Marketing, Leadership, Growth, development, and Human Resources all hinge on human psychology. Learn psychology.
17. Teach others what you learn and learn from others what they know. Everyone has useful information, wisdom, and expertise.
18. Meditation isn't about clearing your mind. That's like telling a fish to stop swimming. The mind's nature is to think. Meditation is about being aware of these thoughts and seeing them objectively, detached, from a distance. Like traffic. River water. Clouds. Eventually, you will learn the craziest truth: Your thoughts are not yours. They are coming from elsewhere. You are simply picking up a transmission. It's up to you which thoughts to embrace or discard. But they are always coming.
19. Identify your boundaries. Being on call 24/7 is not for everyone. Nor should it.
20. I am a night owl. But graveyard shift is too late.
21. Turn off your notifications. Get to things on your own time. Notifications hack your mind and destroy concentration. Remember the first rule.
22. Repeat success often. Replicate it. Template it. Build every system around successful endeavors.
23. Encourage others. The best teams or bands I've ever worked in were the most positive encouraging people I know.
24. Platitudes hold overlooked truths. Live. Laugh. Love. These really are the keys to a good life. An environment of good humor goes a long way.
25. It's Life Work Balance. Not the other way around. Work to live, not live to work. America has a really twisted view of this idea.
26. Try stuff. The more experimental and weird the better. Be different. Be bold. Or be forgotten.
27. "Opportunities multiply as they are seized." These are the words of Sun Tzu from Art of War. Many people cite this book as inspiration and have never read it. I have. Many times. I own 3 translations of it.
28. Get enough sleep. 7 hours minimum. In your 20s you can get away with skipping this more often. I certainly did. But 30s not so much. 40s. Forget it. 4 hours sleep feels exactly like a full night bender. Without the good times.
29. Know your worth. If the money ain't there, don't wait for it to arrive. It won't. No one creates our destiny. That's our job.
30. Slow down. It will all work out.
31. Fight for the underdog. Always. They generally fight with the most heart and often beat the odds.
32. Never overstay your welcome. When it's time to go, go. No sense in sticking around longer than you have to. That goes for small talk, careers, relationships, dinner dates, and performances. Leave 'em wanting more.
33. Travel. Even if it's just to another nearby town, city, or state. See things you haven't seen, be places you aren't familiar with. Get lost. You'll find your way eventually. And you'll have an adventure to remember and share.
34. No high-profile interview I've ever done was because of me. It was because someone had something to sell or promote. Interviews are rarely pure. To understand that is to master the interview. Softballs first, get the pitch out of the way, then dig in with the real questions. End on an aspirational question.
35. Tip. Even if the service was bad. It's not about performance, it's about respect.
36. Unlike the movies, a happy ending is never guaranteed. In fact, the odds of that are small. But you have every opportunity to make it happen if you make that a goal.
37. Indulge. But not too much.
38. Nostalgia is fun. But stay there too long and you get trapped there. Same with the future. Stay present.
39. My parents did their best. No matter their mistakes, crimes or bad examples. They loved me and my sisters. I love them back.
40. If you've suffered any sort of trauma, seek guidance and healing. There is nothing wrong with therapy. I recommend EMDR. It changed my life.
41. Happiness is a choice away. Think about that for a second.
42. We are what we think about. Negative or positive, you choose. Thoughts lead to action. Action leads to Destiny.
43. Look for a mentor. Be a mentor.
44. The 9-to-5 is an outdated model. For the most part, time-based work is antiquated and less productive. We were told once that the internet would make our lives easier. Instead, they're more complex, and we are expected to simply "do more" in the same time. Pay should be based on merit, function, and speed. If I can do something in 1 hour instead of 6, I'd rather get my time back than layer more work. Once you escape that mindset, possibilities open up. That’s where Freedom lives.
45. Pet dogs and cats.
46. We are eternal limitless souls piloting a meat suit for a short ride on a moving ball of life called Earth. Lean into it but don't rush it. The ride is over before we know it. And when it's over, we are freed of these fragile, achy, busted suits and we go back to the source, where we came from and then we go on another adventure. That cycle repeats forever.
47. Learn a musical instrument. You don’t have to be good at it, just have fun with it. I recommend the guitar, but I’m biased.